In Toastmasters, our tagline is where leaders are made.
The question is – Are you becoming the leader you are capable of being?

While there is a plethora of opportunities within Toastmasters to become an effective leader, the making of a leader is a process. A process is not something that happens overnight. It is a journey that we choose to go on. It is a journey of choosing to be intentional about always learning and growing so that we can become the best version of ourselves. The day we think we have arrived or know it all will be the day that we have the greatest lesson to learn of all. The fact is even the most world-renowned leaders and communicators – whoever you may think that is – can still be a better leader and communicator.

In the book, The Ideal Team Player by Patrick Lencioni, the author talks about three character traits that will set you apart as an ideal team player. I believe that as these traits are cultivated in our lives, they will set us apart in the absolute best way possible. What are these traits?

Number 1: Humility

C.S. Lewis defines true humility “as not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.” When we think of ourselves less, we are able to think of the greater good. We think from a place of empathy and ask ourselves, “What is in the best interest of those that we are serving?” Sadly, this mindset is, at times, in stark contrast to the narrative we often hear promoted that encourages people to look out for number 1 – themselves – with no regard for others, and yet, a truly effective leader and team player will think about others and how the group or team can be more effective in the pursuit of the goals they are seeking to achieve.

Humble people are willing to own their failures or flaws, apologize for their mistakes, and accept other people’s apologies. They recognize that none of us our perfect and are willing to own their missteps and/or part in relational disconnects. Arrogant people, on the other hand, are quick to point the finger and blame everyone else. Humble people own what is theirs to own. In the process, they seek to understand how they can learn and grow through challenging times so that they can be a more effective communicator and leader. This type of mindset promotes a win-win for relationships and team success.

Humble people can also sincerely appreciate the strengths, skills, talents, and abilities of others. They recognize that they can’t do it all nor are they an expert on every subject. They recognize that collectively a team can be more effective and deliver better results when each person is allowed to shine in their areas of strength. In relationships and in teams, a humble person sees how they can complete the other person rather than compete with them so that the best possible results can be achieved and relationships can function at the healthiest and most optimal levels.

Humility is without question one of the most important traits of healthy relationships and successful teams.

Number 2: Hungry

When individuals are truly hungry, excellence is their signature. Mediocre or simply meeting expectations is not an option. They are self-motivated to work hard and take initiative as they strive to go above and beyond what is expected. They seek to do their personal best to help the team go to the next level. They do not make excuses for why requested tasks are not completed in the time frame requested. While it is true that life happens even in the best of situations, they try to overcome completion challenges. If they legitimately cannot complete requested tasks in the time frame requested, they clearly communicate with the requestor the challenge and if appropriate with those impacted.

Hungry people realize they have not arrived. They are correctable and teachable. They intentionally seek out learning and mentoring opportunities. They hunger to glean from those who are more knowledgeable than they are in a given area so that they can continually bring the best version of themselves to each and every situation they encounter. They recognize that the key to making a difference is about valuing people and adding value to them.

Number 3: (Emotionally) Smart

A key part of being emotionally intelligent or smart is being self-aware. Do you recognize your strengths, weaknesses, and growth opportunities? While having a healthy self-esteem is important, it is equally important to understand where your weaknesses and growth opportunities are. It will communicate that you are human, and just like everyone else on the planet, you are a person in process which will give you credibility. With that said, in leadership roles, do all that you can to operate in your strength and passion zones. Where you are not strong or passionate, find people who are and let them run the ball. While it is good to, where appropriate, shore up your weaknesses, there are times when for efficiency and the overall productivity of the team, it is better for you to delegate. You will be seen as a much more effective leader.

Being emotionally smart means asking good questions, listening well, and knowing how to respond effectively. When you do this, it will demonstrate that as an individual, a leader, and a team player, you seek to understand. It will also clearly communicate to those that we interact with that YOU SEE THEM, YOU HEAR THEM, and YOU VALUE THEM, which has been shown to be the most powerful message we can communicate with our words and our deeds.

I encourage you to cultivate the character traits of humility, hunger and (emotional) intelligence, and you will become the best version of YOU. You will become the leader that you are capable of being which will set you apart in the absolute best way possible in every arena of your life.

I Believe in YOU and in YOUR Potential!

Remember that TOGETHER – The BEST is Yet Ahead!

Committed to YOUR Success,

Colleen Marie

Colleen Marie Kelly, DTM
2023-2024 District 6 Director